We’ve Lost A Bell Cow

I don't remember the first time I met Billy Joe Rish. He was an institution in this county way long before I got here. I was a little surprised when he knocked on the door of the ex-hardware store where I was living my first year in town. This was 1969.
"Coach, my family is riding over to the Bay County Fair. Come on and go with us."
I didn't have to check my social calendar. I didn't have to call anyone to let them know where I was going. No one was going to miss me. I had spent the first half-dozen week-ends in my new surroundings out on a park bench I'd pulled up in front of the store. I whiled away the hours practicing my Tennessee "howdy" wave on folks I didn't know as they came and went to town.
Miss Carol climbed in the back with Jay and Cathy. Before I could settle in my seat we were passing St. Joe Beach. I reckoned we were running late. He asked about the football team. And where I was from. And how I liked St. Joe. And what church I went to. And how often I called my mama.....
He had digested my whole life before we got to 15th Street. In between answers he filled me in on Gulf County and its list of characters. I laughed along with every story and marveled at all he knew. And I also marveled that an established family and local icon would take the time to haul a 21 year old newcomer to Panama City on a Saturday afternoon.
He didn't run into me by accident. He and Carol had talked it over! I don't know to this day how they felt my loneliness. Or what impressed on them my need for a friendly face. Or how they showed up at just the right time. I will tell you this, they offered me a heck of a lot more than just a trip to the fair!
"Coach, I'm not too big on the rides. They've got a chewing tobacco contest here somewhere." It took us a while to get down to the spitting booth. He knew every single person at the fair. And I mean every one! They all stopped to chat! It was amazing! He talked cattle, politics, boundary lines, fishing at Howard Creek, Bob Sikes' latest comments, wood chopping, the state hospital at Chattahoochee, the new baseball play-off system, the pros and cons of the Dead Lakes dam, local industry, Bob Graham's merits, Gulf Coast Junior College, the price of eggs in China...... I felt pretty dang important just walking along beside him.
He signed us both up for the accuracy and the distance contests. I was a little nervous. I was ok to middling on the accuracy part but I thought I had a chance in the distance category. I had been a proponent of the quick hip-neck snap method of distance spitting for years.
Billy Joe got me over to the side, gave me a chew of Beech Nut and we practiced a little. He was serious about this thing! I came in second in the accuracy part. He was so proud of me. He was introducing me to everyone standing around. The distance contest was a different matter. The wind kicked up a little and a couple of fellows from up near Wausau loaded (added some bb's or bits of gum) their chew as to take unfair advantage. The extra weight put them way out front. Neither me or Billy Joe placed. I wanted to cry foul but Billy Joe just laughed. He wouldn't let me pay him back for the entry fee.
I brought my Cathy to town a few years later. We were down at Doll Collier's store when Billy Joe and Cliff Sanborn came in. He offered to pay for all the oysters she could eat. Well, you know how little Cathy is.... She will fool you! She was on her fourth or fifth dozen when me and Cliff left'em. I don't know how many she ate. Billy Joe talked about that for years. He always liked her better than he did me!
I got tricked into trying politics several years back. Billy Joe never said yea or nay about it. He didn't encourage or discourage. I didn't find out until months later that he had very quietly been helping me from the first announcement. Shucks, I should have asked him for money.....
He took to calling me Kelsey. He always raised his voice when he "declared" it to make sure I understood the pun he intended. He was poking a little fun at all of those well meaning folks that never get my name right.
He gave my oldest son a job when he was still in high school and jobs were hard to come by. Billy Joe would go up to the farm and work right along side of him. I never knew exactly what he and Josh did up there. But Josh would come home, dirty as a pig that had wallowed on the wet side all day, and regale Cathy and me with tales about stump pulling, hay pitching or some early settlers to Gulf County. The silence on the other end of the line when I told him of Billy Joe's passing spoke volumes. And was a far more fitting tribute than I could ever give.
Billy Joe just recently had taken an active interest in my youngest son. "Kelsey, give me a few days. I'll think of something."
He didn't tell me he liked me. He didn't make a "noise" over helping me. And he didn't treat me special nor was I one of his favorites. He just, from day one, afforded me the best southern courtesy and respect he could muster. I fear it is a way of life that is fast fading from the scene.
There will be great accolades paid to him in the coming days, weeks and months. And they will all be correct and fitting. Billy Joe's life affected so many people. There are many, many folks that knew him better, loved him more and can tell his story much better than me.
This little blurb is in no way an attempt to pay the homage that is due him. I just appreciate that he and Carol were there when I needed them. And he saw fit to hang around to make sure I turned out alright.
I don't believe I ever thanked him.
Respectfully,
"Kelsey"