Lady and Gentlemen of the BOCC, first let me say I use the term gentlemen sparingly.
Some options are being considered to improve the financial position of our county. The problem with the gas tax increase is, though it benefits us during the tourist seasons, it adversely affects residents year round. Many of our residents travel considerable distances daily to earn a living.
Certainly county-wide mandatory trash pickup is an issue that all commissioners "should be able to agree on" in light of the losing situation with the landfill.
Speaking of county-wide, three of you ran on a promise of pursuing county-wide voting but we hear little about that in your bi monthly, early morning, keep those pesky citizens away, in-your-face-meetings.
But I digress.
Reality TV programs are all the rage these days with Duck Dynasty, Honey BooBoo, Auto Repo, etc. The networks and participants make millions off this nonsense.
Nonsense? Folks we have it right here in Gulf County with our BOCC meetings. A golden opportunity is right before our very eyes to make megabucks for our high rolling commissioners to spend. Tru Tv will jump at it.
Consider the cast of characters.
Tan (The Gavel) Smiley, best known for his disorderly conducting of meetings, allowing the disrespecting of Ms. Bryan and "I don't read emails".
Carmen (in your face) McLemore, the mosquito truck driver and big BP check recipient, who has now dedicated his position to the harassment of Ms. Bryan at every opportunity. The blowhard who dislikes taxpaying blowins. Who can forget the BOCC meeting at which he advocated war between north and south Gulf County! Very constructive.
Michael (in your face disgrace and it's my jail and you are not allowed in Ms. Bryan) Hammond. I believe it's not the law that every Florida county have a jail, Mr. Hammond.
Our heroine and blowin Joanna Bryan, is the citizens advocate who sits calmly by while these southern gentlemen trash talk her constructive suggestions. Hopefully she will maintain her resolve and stay with us contrary to Mr. McLemore's thinking. Her constituents and I believe a majority of Gulf Countians are in full support of her actions.
Finally we have Messrs. McDaniel and Yeager, who though they have been responsible in serving Gulf countians, they have been reluctant to enter this fray.
To make this reality skit a hit we need a knight in shining armor to come riding in on his pickup truck and come to the aid of our fair maiden Ms. Bryan.
Ward, Warren, stardom awaits, how about it?
So that’s it folks, World Wrestling? "just fahget abot it", coming your way, taa daa!
Gulf County Smack Down with the above cast of all-star characters.
The all new season begins Jan. 14 so tune in and don't miss it.
Another happy, full time resident Blow In.
Port St. Joe