Cranks My Tractor

Published: Thursday, August 29, 2013 at 08:58 AM.

Unfortunately, it didn’t work out that way.  Narváez was a miserable failure.  It is not certain where and the exact date that he died in 1528.  If I were to assume, I would have to think that he got too far out in the Gulf of Mexico on one of those inflatable alligators and his sword or lance pierced the plastic.

It is important to note that it is plainly noted on all of those inflatable things that they are “Not to be used as a lifesaving device.” In my opinion, none of them should be trusted outside of one of those blue plastic pools they sell outside of the Wal-Mart or K-Mart.

My historical thoughts were interrupted inside of this beach store when I looked over to see my two teenagers holding and discussing what was obviously a coffee cup that looked like a female front body part/headlight.

My daughter, who is 17, was holding this thing by the handle arguing with her 15 year-old brother.  She said, “No it’s not, it’s a shell.”  My son started laughing saying something to the effect of “Look where the hole is.”

My daughter, who did incredibly well on the SAT and can have her pick of colleges turned a sunburned shade of red.  She was not sunburned; the weather had been rather rainy, cloudy and yucky since we arrived.

Then they both looked at me…

It was one of those priceless moments…

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