Short men and tall equations

Published: Thursday, June 19, 2014 at 10:55 AM.

June is one of my months to perform my ushering duties at church.   The first Sunday of the month is always a little hectic with more going on at church than other Sundays in the month.  Early in the week, I got a call from my buddy and head usher noting that I should try to be there about 30 minutes early.

At about the time I should have been getting to church, I was still trying to steam the wrinkles out of my blazer that I only wear about 4 months out of the year when I’m doing my ushering duties.  I was going to be late.

My worst fears were realized…

When I walked in the left door of the sanctuary, two ushers were standing at my left door.  I was sick.  The left door is mine.  Attendance at church is always better on the left side when I am in charge of the left door.  Everyone knows it is – because I tell them it is.

As I walked through the left door on my way to pick up my official usher name tag, I told them, “I’ll be back, this is my door.”  They looked at me kind of puzzled; I go to large church and everyone doesn’t understand that the left door is mine four months out of the year.  I was perfectly willing to forgive them for their lack of understanding.

After hanging my name tag around my neck, I walked out and was met by my buddy – the head usher. He said, “Why don’t you take the right door over there.”

My heart sunk…

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