Cranks My Tractor

Published: Thursday, June 20, 2013 at 11:14 AM.

Everyone has their own way of collecting money for the office coffee.  Downstairs, they simply have a red metal box with a little lock on it and one slot on the top to drop your money.  For the first few months, there was one older gentleman, who is affectionately known as “Santa Claus” who would wander in when I was getting my coffee.

Santa Claus never said much; sometimes he would grunt or just mumble.  It wasn’t an unhappy grunt; I think he was just trying to make conversation.  I’m sure that he has a Ph.D. in something very impressive and is doing some very important research.

Seeing him walking down the hall one day behind me, I decided to have a little fun.  As he came into the kitchen, I poured a cup of coffee and put my quarter in the red metal box.  Then I stood staring at the red metal box.  The red metal box has a little black and white plastic frog glued to the top.

The Santa Claus fellow seemed to be getting anxious.  I continued to stand there in front of the coffee pot, staring at the red metal box.  I waited a while longer.  Finally, Santa Claus let go of a good grunt.  I’m pretty sure the translation of the grunt would be, “Please move, I want my coffee now.”

I got down for a close examination of the red metal box as if to talk to the black and white plastic frog.  Then I calmly said, “I put a quarter in there and it still has not given me a nickel back.”  

Then Santa Claus spoke and I could understand him.  He said, “I don’t think it will.”   I did my best to look confused and I took my coffee and left.

It was a good day; I got Santa Claus to talk.  I’m sure he thinks I’m a nut, but that’s ok.

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