It seems this year has been a very good or bad year for flies, depending on whether you are a person or a fly. That is the case at my house anyway. I think there is some sort of correlation with this boatload of flies at my house and the number of times the dogs go in and out of the house.


There also seems to be a lot more flies outside. Again, I kind of think that what the dogs are doing when they go outside has something to do with this also. Sometimes I think I am running one of those pet hotels, or doggy day cares. As a matter of fact, I guess I am. I love dogs, but I do hate flies. My girls are home for the summer, giving me two extra dogs.


I’m always battling something in the yard, be it voles, moles, squirrels, rabbits, deer, ants, snakes or something else. I love nature, but I want it on just the other side of my property line. I want to be able to see it, but I don’t want it eating my shrubbery, digging holes in my yard and tunneling who knows where.


So my latest trip to the hardware store was to find ways of reducing the number of flies I have outside.


Inside, I seem to have a handle on. Last summer I bought one of those tennis rackets that “zaps” or electrocutes flies when you hit them. My girls are all pretty good tennis players and seem to have mostly eliminated the flies that manage to get inside.


At the hardware store, I decided on both “sticky traps” and “trap traps.” I am not sure what they are actually called, but I think those names are appropriate. The sticky traps are pretty colors, or are supposed to be pretty colors or patterns which are attractive to flies. The fly lands on the trap and never leaves.


I’m telling you, my green, blue and yellow sticky traps work like a charm. I’m a math fellow and I like to count things – even flies. I lost count at around 100 and that was in one day. It grossed my girls out – both me counting flies and the flies stuck to the sticky trap. I mean they were in there so tight, it really wasn’t green, blue and yellow anymore – it was “fly-colored.”


The trap traps are a bag that you put water in and this magic powder that disintegrates in the water and evidently lets off a smell or something that makes flies think there is a big party going on. The kind of party that they don’t want to miss. However, there is only a way into the party and no way out. The bag claimed that it would start working in 30 minutes. Honestly, it took much less time for it to start working.


I had pretty much maxed out my traps in a couple of days, but trapping flies is much easier that keeping squirrels or underground critters away.


I just hope that these flies don’t have some sort of super powers or something. It reminds me of that movie, “The Fly,” made back in the late 1950s. The movie is a story of a scientist who is transformed into a grotesque creature after a common house fly enters into this “molecular transporter” the scientist is using for experiments. Somehow, this causes the scientist’s atoms to be combined with those of the fly, which produces a human-fly hybrid.


I don’t think I have a molecular transporter, but I know I have made a lot of flies mad at me. I will stay on the lookout and if you know of anything that works this well on squirrels, please let me know.


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